I seem to have changed. Really?

I once remembered that as a kid, i used to yearn to grow up. I wanted to see the world, I wanted to live the life of an adult and freed myself of restrictions. Perhaps I had a very difficult childhood, I lived the life that was so unlike a kid.

When I was young, everything was within my grasp. I remembered that I was rewarded for everything. I was an overachiever, I excelled in every field that I embarked on. Did I feel a sense of pride when I topped school again and again? Did I feel happy? Was I ever contented? Nevertheless, I just worked hard. Because what used to define me was hard work and achievement.

When I was young, i was innocent and idealistic. I believed in fairy tales stories that my Dad used to tell me. Romantic novels say that true love exists, there is such a thing as "happily ever after". There is someone who will be there for you when you need. Is it true? Affairs? Sleepovers? Two timers? Time and again it existed. Am I too pessimistic? I doubt so.

I believe that love is about giving in and sacrifices. I scorn at my friends who are so in love with their other half. To me, that is temporal. I do not see a future in them. Then, I tried to bury myself in accomplishments, perfection, money, academic success and friends. People criticize me. They say that I am superficial, childish, materialistic and impractical. Yes, I do feel empty but just because of that doesn't mean that I have to believe in relationships.

I fucking screwed up my life when I really believed that there is true love. I travelled around Singapore to buy food for my partner. I tried to help her in her work. I spent every minute with her and tried to catch up with her if possible. I was happy. I smiled genuinely. That was the only occasion I gave it all up. Me. Myself. and my ONE AND ONLY HEART.

I cried. Because I was truly myself and that was the problem. She detested me for my habits, she complained about my geniality. I realised that humans are selfish. They fall in love with you, not for who you are but what you represent.

Yet, here I am, I still believe in love. I don't care if you cheat, you lie, you fade again. Cos it is only in fairy tales that there is forever.

I am looking for someone who can share happiness with. Someone to hear me when I am sad, someone to share, someone to be myself.

Over the years, I am getting better, in whatever way the society defines as "good".

But I am still the same Shao Wei, as before.

Longing for love. Because that is the greatest gift of life.

and I believe that I exist because I can trust, I can have faith in relationships.

So I don't care. Hurt me again. 1000 times. I still want to try. I still want to be genuine to myself. This is my only life.

I want you to walk with me. I want to take care of you and I want you to accept me for who I am.

introducing a new sport for all youths and the young at heart!

Flippa Ball

So what is this all about?

"Flippa Ball is a modified version of water polo for beginners. It is a fun, simple game that can be played by all regardless of their height, gender and most importantly of all, their swimming ability. Being a modified version of water polo, Flippa Ball is played in the shallow end of the pool so that one may use the bottom of the pool to rest and for added security and safety. Flippa Ball aims to introduce people to a modified version of water polo by providing an enjoyable, interactive game that will encourage them to pursue the sport and go on to play water polo.Through participation in Flippa Ball, one will learn and develop skills that are needed for water polo with greater ease. " http://flippaball.wikispaces.com/

Look at some HOT ACTIONS for some interest stimulation.

Interested? You can sign up at swimming associations in Singapore or watch Channel 5's newest drama Polo Boys for more details.

It's a HOT HOT SEPTEMBER(Besides F1 Night Race and the hot grid girls [not important!] lah)

Just when you think that September is a dull month for shopping, you are terribly wrong! Imagine my gleeful smile when I realise that newurbanmale.com is selling EVERY ITEM OF THEIR SHOP at

how can i every miss such a heavenly offer. Imagine my delight that Brazilian Prada/Havanias only cost like less than 20 bucks. OMG =)